Developmental trauma defines the psychological and physiological consequences of repeated exposure to stressful events in childhood. The ACE study (adverse childhood experiences) helps us identify the categories that can impact development. Attachment is severely impacted by these early experiences and often leads to one of the non-secure attachment styles.
Symptoms from this can be felt into adulthood and some evidence suggests in future generations. You can learn more about this connection here.
Finding Hope Through Somatic Therapy
There is hope! Somatic therapy is a modality designed to process traumatic events that have been stored for many years. While our desire is to get kids help as quickly as possible, we also know that there are many adults suffering from what they experienced in childhood who may or may not have fully made the connection yet. If you are one of those adults, keep reading!
The Power of Parental Gaze and Early Connection
The mother’s gaze, or the father's, determines more than you might realize about how you come to see yourself, your place in the world, and how you view the people around you. Many attachment researchers have found that eye gaze creates an all-important connection in early parental bonding and is necessary for healthy emotional development to occur. The simple meeting of the eyes can evoke positive feelings of love and safety.
If you are a loving person today, you likely received a loving look from your mother and your father in the first years of your life. It has been said we often seek that connection for the rest of our lives: someone delighting in us with unconditional love the way our early caregivers did.
If you did not experience such loving looks from your parents, I hope you have found other compassionate people to reflect that love for you over time. Receiving that love is required for us to turn around and give it to someone else. This is where somatic therapy can be a huge resource to those of us struggling with difficult early stories that impact our relationships with self and others in the here and now.
Rebuilding Through Somatic Therapy
Somatic therapy works as a bottom-up process that begins with our senses in addition to our thoughts. When the amygdala is hijacked, it can be difficult to focus on anything other than escaping the threat (real or perceived). This leaves very little room for safe explorations of our bodies through sensation, image, or expression.
Slowing down to connect with those somatic experiences causes the brain to pause and explore something other than a threat. This can help us slowly uncouple the impact of the neglect or abuse and instead allow the original desire for connection and safety to unfold. Having that repair met (sometimes years later) and met with consistency can begin to rewire our brains finding more pleasure or ease and less constriction or terror.
Trauma and the Nervous System
Trauma is held in the nervous system and not in the event. This statement helps us understand the lack of being able to “get over or let go” of difficult memories from childhood. Dr. Peter Levine (founder of Somatic Experiencing) adds trauma occurs, “With the lack of an empathetic witness”. Growing up in a home with little empathy creates experiences that impact our nervous system. With these experiences, we can become conditioned to respond to events in the present with more of a survival response instead of a grounded or neutral response.
When the threat cycle doesn’t complete, returning us to safe neutrality, we become stuck. The nervous system responds as if there is an active threat or as if overwhelm is still occurring- this is a signal happening beyond our control. Someone is experiencing trauma when the event does not feel in the past but continues to leave them overwhelmed in the present. A great example of this in developmental trauma can be feeling overwhelmed by little things expressed in partners, roommates, co-workers, or friends.
This is not just about identifying little and big traumatic experiences throughout our lives but requires us to slow down and ask, “Where do I feel overwhelmed and what is underneath that?” Doing this work with someone trained to read the physiology (autonomic nervous system) can help us transition from being stuck and overwhelmed into a place where our body feels safe to express suppressed emotions. This often happens through image, movement, and sensation.
Challenges of Reconnecting with the Body
If you have experienced early abuse, neglect, or unprocessed early trauma you might find it difficult to go within and connect with your body. Attentiveness and awareness are very difficult to practice when your internal world is screaming. A question asked often in Somatic therapy is, “Can you tell me where you feel that in your body?” While this question can contain valuable feedback and help those with anxiety feel the way their chest tightens or throat begins to constrict, many times it can exacerbate someone with early trauma. This is in part because the body has not been a safe place to explore for a really long time.
Repairing the Relationship Between Mind and Body
With developmental trauma, the whole body can feel awful (global activation) at any given moment or simply offer zero feedback (high-functioning freeze state) no matter how we might ask it to communicate. Learning the language of the nervous system is learning the language of the body. Somatic therapy begins with this through a slow resourceful introduction and the therapist often becomes the one to help mediate the connection between the mind and the body or the adult self and parts of the self that have been cut off based on early survival strategies.
This modality is not about the body being superior to the mind but instead repairing the relationship between the two, increasing the integration of experience and affect. Beginning with repairing the relationship between the mind and the body can be a beautiful start.
What does my body have to say? How does my mind respond? There are many interventions to aid in this inward-focused relational repair. But one of my favorites is writing a letter to the body. Below is a small excerpt from that type of letter and one that I wrote over a decade ago reflecting on my own experience in somatic therapy.
…. She talks about you like you are the most important person in the room. When my mind speaks, she interrupts to ask what you have to say or how you are feeling. She gives you more attention than I have ever seen someone give their body. She teaches me that I should begin to treat you with the same concern and respect I offer my own children. I begin to do this by resting more often, taking deep breaths, and acknowledging your messages of pain. By touching the spots that cry out for reassurance that everything is ok. By allowing our organs to feel the support and not the anxiety….
Healing as a Journey
Developmental trauma impacts most areas of life and can be a slow journey of healing and change. Considering each step as a developmental milestone reclaimed can help us understand the path is less about verbally expressing (sometimes known as trauma dumping) and instead giving the body time to catch up with the mind. Reminding the body that the threat has passed, and it can experience safety now even when it is in a vulnerable state of relationship. While professional in nature, the therapeutic relationship can act as a bridge to healing and hope.
We are born in a relationship, we are wounded in a relationship, and we can be healed in a relationship. -Harville Hendrix
At Compass Healing Project we invite you to heal in a relationship that was injuried long ago. As a somatic therapist, I can help you write a letter to your body or explore other interventions to support your healing journey with developmental trauma. We have a team of trained holistic and somatic therapists who specialize in helping you bridge the gap between what happened in the past and who you are becoming.
Begin Healing With Somatic Therapy in San Diego, CA
Take the first step toward healing the wounds of your past with compassionate, holistic support. Somatic therapy in San Diego, CA can help you reconnect with your body, release stored trauma, and find a sense of safety and ease in your life. Reach out to our team of somatic therapists at Compass Healing Project to begin your journey toward the peace and connection you deserve. Follow these three simple steps to get started:
Reach Out and Fill out our New Client Inquiry Form to get started.
Schedule a discovery call with one of our skilled somatic therapists to discuss your needs and goals with Somatic Therapy.
Begin your healing journey!
Other Counseling Services at Compass Healing Project
At Compass Healing Project, we take a holistic approach to therapy, using a range of modalities to support various mental health needs. In addition to helping you heal from developmental trauma with somatic therapy, we offer EMDR, Clinical Sexology, hypnotherapy, ketamine-assisted therapy, and embodiment practices—each tailored to help with anxiety, depression, PTSD, grief, sexuality concerns, and relationship issues. To learn more about our services, visit our blog or connect with our compassionate therapists in Colorado and California, who specialize in trauma resolution, emotional healing, and integrative therapy to support your journey to well-being.
About The Author
Linda Rankin is an Associate Marriage and Family Therapist offering holistic therapy in California (online statewide) and in our in-person office in San Diego, CA. She has openings for individuals, families, teens, and relationships. She is supervised closely by Natalie Cooney (LMFT#94578) and is a Somatic Experiencing Practitioner with over 20 years of experience as a healer, guide, and helper. She specializes in trauma resolution, depression, spiritual integration, and attachment repair. Book a discovery call today!
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